The Wager

I think the gifted program sets you up for a lot of heartache.

It basically gives you the seed of an idea "you might be remarkable".

My entire life, I've been wrestling with that idea. I think if I were able to just accept that I am relatively normal, I would be happier. Things would be easier.

But I can't.

There's this little, narcissistic part of me that keeps piping up, time and time again, saying I am special, saying I could be or do or create something really astounding, and that part of me makes me always want to strive for a version of myself that will be remarkable.

It's a bet with really bad odds, but it's one I take every time.

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